Master's catholicity — Different paths for different temperaments — Dogmatism condemned — Encouragement to Vijay — How to deal with wicked people — Advice to householders — Difference between ordinary men and Incarnations — Nature of the ever-perfect — Illustration of homa bird — Discrimination about food — Master's divine madness — Oneness of Sakti and Brahman — Knowledge and ignorance — Child like faith — Danger of Tantrik discipline — Master's inner experiences
Friday, September 26, 1884
SRI RAMAKRISHNA had come to Calcutta. It
was the first day of the Durga
Puja, the great religious festival, and the Hindus of the metropolis
were celebrating it. The Master intended to visit the image of the
Divine
Mother at Adhar's house. He also wanted to see Shivanath, the Brahmo
devotee.
It was about midday. Umbrella in hand, M. was pacing the foot-path in
front of the Brahmo Samaj temple. Two hours had passed but the Master
had
not yet appeared. Now and then M. sat down on the steps of Dr.
Mahalnavish's
dispensary and watched the joy and mirth of the people, young and
old, who were celebrating the Puja.
A little after three the Master's carriage drove up. As soon as Sri
Ramakrishna
stepped out he saluted the temple of the Brahmo Samaj with folded
hands. Hazra and a few other devotees were with him. M. bowed before
the
Master and took the dust of his feet. The Master told him that he was
going
to Shivanath's house. A few minutes later several members of the Brahmo
Samaj came and took him to Shivanath's. But Shivanath was not at home.
Shortly afterwards Vijay Goswami, Mahalnavish, and several other Brahmo
leaders greeted the Master and took him inside the Brahmo temple.
Sri Ramakrishna was in a happy mood. He was given a seat below the
altar. There the Brahmo devotees sang their devotional music. Vijay and
the
Brahmo devotees sat in front of the Master.
MASTER (to Vijay, with a smile): "I
was told that you had put up a
'signboard' here that people belonging to other faiths are not allowed
to
come in. Narendra, too, said to me: 'You shouldn't go to the Brahmo
Samaj.
You had better visit Shivanath's house.'
"But I say that we are all calling on the same God. Jealousy and malice
need not be. Some say that God is formless, and some that God has form.
I say, let one man meditate on God with form if he believes in form,
and let
another meditate on the formless Deity if he does not believe in form.
What
I mean is that dogmatism is not good. It is not good to feel that my
religion
alone is true and other religions are false. The correct attitude is
this: My
religion is right, but I do not know whether other religions are right
or
wrong, true or false. I say this because one cannot know the
true-nature of
God unless one realizes Him. Kabir used to say: 'God with form is my
Mother, the Formless is my Father. Which shall I blame? Which shall I
praise? The two pans of the scales are equally heavy.'
"Hindus, Mussalmans, Christians, Saktas, Saivas, Vaishnavas, the
Brahmajnanis of the time of the rishis, and you, the Brahmajnanis of
modern
times, all seek the same object. A mother prepares dishes to suit the
stomachs
of her children. Suppose a mother has five children and a fish is
bought for
the family. She doesn't cook pilau or kalia for all of them. All have
not the
same power of digestion; so she prepares a simple stew for some. But
she
loves all her children equally.
"Do you know my attitude? I love all the preparations of fish. I have a
womanly nature. (All laugh.) I feel myself at home
with every dish — fried
fish, fish cooked with turmeric powder, pickled fish. And further, I
equally
relish rich preparations like fish-head, kalia, and pilau. (All
laugh.)
"Do you know what the truth is? God has made different religions to
suit
different aspirants, times, and countries. All doctrines are only so
many
paths; but a path is by no means God Himself. Indeed, one can reach God
if one follows any of the paths with whole-hearted devotion. Suppose
there
are errors in the religion that one has accepted; if one is sincere and
earnest,
then God Himself will correct those errors. Suppose a man has set out
with
a, sincere desire to visit Jagannath at Puri and by mistake has gone
north
instead of south; then certainly someone meeting him on the way will
tell
him: 'My good fellow, don't go that way. Go to the south.' And the man
will reach Jagannath sooner or later.
"If there are errors in other religions, that is none of our business.
God, to
whom the world belongs, takes care of that. Our duty is somehow to
visit
Jagannath. (To the Brahmos) The view you hold is
good indeed. You
describe God as formless. That is fine. One may eat a cake with icing,
either
straight or sidewise. It will taste sweet either way.
"But dogmatism is not good. You have no doubt heard the story of the
chameleon. A man entered a wood and saw a chameleon on a tree. He
reported to his friends, 'I have seen a red lizard.' He was firmly
convinced
that it was nothing but red. Another person, after visiting the tree,
said,
'I have seen a green lizard.' He was firmly convinced that it was
nothing but
green. But the man who lived under the tree said: 'What both of you
have
said is true. But the fact is that the creature is sometimes red,
sometimes
green, sometimes yellow, and sometimes has no colour at all.'
"God has been described in the Vedas as both with attributes and
without.
You describe Him as without form only. That is one-sided. But never
mind.
If you know one of His aspects truly, you will be able to know His
other
aspects too. God Himself will tell you all about them. (Pointing
to two or
three Brahmo devotees) Those who come to your Samaj know both
this
gentleman and that."
Vijay still belonged to the Sadharan Brahmo Samaj. He was a salaried
preacher of that organization but could not obey all its rules and
regulations.
He mixed with those who believed in God with form. This was creating a
misunderstanding between him and the Brahmo authorities. Many Brahmos
disapproved of his conduct. The Master suddenly looked at Vijay and
began to talk to him.
MASTER (to Vijay, smiling): "I
understand that they have been finding
fault with you for mixing with those who believe in God with form. Is
that
true? He who is a devotee of God must have an understanding that cannot
be shaken under any conditions. He must be like the anvil in a
blacksmith's
shop. It is constantly being struck by the hammer; still it is
unshaken. Bad
people may abuse you very much and speak ill of you; but you must bear
with them all if you sincerely seek God. Isn't it possible to think of
God in
the midst of the wicked? Just think of the rishis of ancient times.
They
used to meditate on God in the forest, surrounded on all sides by
tigers,
bears, and other ferocious beasts. Wicked men have the nature of tigers
and
bears. They will pursue you to do you an injury.
"One must be careful about these few things. First, an influential man
who has much money and many men under his control. He can injure you
if he wants; you must be careful while talking to him; perhaps you may
have to approve what he says. Second, a dog. When it chases you or
barks
at you, you must stand still, talk to it gently, and pacify it. Third,
a bull.
If it runs after you with lowered horns, you must calm it with a gentle
Voice. Fourth, a drunkard. If you arouse his anger, he will abuse you,
naming
fourteen generations of your family. You should say to him; 'Hello
uncle! How are you?' Then he will be mightily pleased and sit by you
and
smoke.
"In the presence of a wicked person I become alert. If such a man asks
me whether I have a pipe for smoking, I say, 'Yes, I have.' Some people
have the nature of a snake: they will bite you without warning. You
have
to discriminate a great deal in order to avoid the bite; otherwise your
passion
will be stirred up to such an extent that you will feel like doing
injury in
return. The companionship of a holy man is greatly needed now and then.
It enables one to discriminate between the Real and the unreal."
VIJAY: "I have no time, sir. I am entangled in my duties here."
MASTER: "You are a religious teacher. Others
have holidays, but not so a
religious teacher. When the manager of an estate brings order to one
part of
it, the landlord sends him to another part. So you have no leisure." (All
laugh.)
VIJAY (with folded hands): "Sir,
please give me your blessing."
MASTER: "Now you are talking like an
ignorant person. It is God alone who blesses."
VIJAY: "Revered sir, please give us some instruction."
The Master glanced around the Brahmo temple and said with a smile,
"This is nice too — a mixture of crystals and syrup.1
There are crystals, and there is syrup too.
"I have scored too many points and am therefore out of the game. (All
laugh.) Do you know the game called 'nax'? It is a game of
cards, and
anyone scoring above seventeen is out of the game. Those who score
fewer points
— say five, seven, or ten — are clever. I have scored too many and am
out of
the game.
"Once Keshab Sen gave a lecture at his house. I was present. Many
people were there. The ladies were seated behind the screen. Keshab, in
the
course of his talk, said, 'O God, please bless us that we may dive and
disappear
altogether in the river of bhakti.' I said to Keshab with a smile: 'If
you disappear altogether in the river of bhakti, then what will be the
fate of
those behind the screen? By all means dive into the river, but you had
better come back to dry land now and then. Don't disappear in the river
altogether.' At these words Keshab and the others burst out laughing.
"Never mind. One can realize God in the world, too, if only one is
sincere. 'I' and 'mine' — that is ignorance. But, 'O God! Thou and
Thine' —
that is knowledge.
"Live in the world like a maidservant in a rich man's house. She
performs
all the household duties, brings up her master's child, and speaks of
him as
'my Hari'. But in her heart she knows quite well that neither the house
nor
the child belongs to her. She performs all her duties, but just the
same her
mind dwells on her native place. Likewise, do your worldly duties but
fix
your mind on God. And know that house, family, and son do not belong to
you; they are God's. You are only His servant.
"I ask people to renounce mentally. I do not ask them to give up the
world. If one lives in the world unattached and seeks God with
sincerity,
then one is able to attain Him.
(To Vijay) "There was a time when I too would
meditate on God with
my eyes closed.2
Then I said to myself: 'Does God exist only when I think
of Him with my eyes closed? Doesn't He exist when I look around with my
eyes open?' Now, when I look around with my eyes open, I see that God
dwells in all beings. He is the Indwelling Spirit of all — men, animals
and
other living beings, trees and plants, sun and moon, land and water.
"Why do I seek Shivanath? He who meditates on God for many days has
substance in him, has divine power in him. Further, he who sings well,
plays well on a musical instrument, or has mastered any one art, has in
him
real substance and the power of God. This is the view of the Gita.
It is said
in the Chandi that he who is endowed with physical
beauty has in him
substance and the power of God. (To Vijay) Ah, what
a beautiful nature
Kedar has! No sooner does he come to me than he bursts into tears. His
eyes
are always red and swim in tears, like a chanabara in syrup."
VIJAY: "At Dacca he is constantly talking
about you. He is always eager to see you."
Sri Ramakrishna was about to depart. The Brahmo devotees bowed low
before him and he returned their salute. Then, getting into the
carriage, he
set out for Adhar's house to see the image of the Divine Mother.
Sunday, September 28, 1884
How shall I open my heart, O friend?
It is forbidden me to speak.
I am about to die, for lack of a kindred soul
To understand my misery. . . .
Kedar sang several other songs. After the music the Master
again talked
to the devotees. Nandalal, Keshab's nephew, was also present with a few
Brahmo friends. They were sitting near the Master.
MASTER (to Vijay and the other devotees): "A man
brought
a bottle of consecrated wine for me; but I couldn't even touch it."
VIJAY: "Ah!"
MASTER: "I become intoxicated at the mere thought of God. I don't have
to take any wine. I feel drunk at the very sight of the charanamrita.5
I feel as if I had drunk five bottles of liquor. When a person attains
such a state he
cannot help discriminating about food."
NARENDRA: "As regards food, one should take whatever comes."
MASTER: "What you say applies only to a particular state of the
aspirant's
mind. No food can harm a jnani. According to the Gita,
the jnani himself
does not eat; his eating is an offering to the Kundalini. But that does
not
apply to a bhakta. The present state of my mind is such that I cannot
eat
any food unless it is first offered to God by a brahmin priest.
Formerly my
state of mind was such that I would enjoy inhaling the smell of burning
corpses, carried by the wind from the other side of the Ganges. It
tasted very
sweet to me. But nowadays I cannot eat food touched by anybody and
everybody. No, I cannot. But once in a while I do. One day I was taken
to see
a performance of a play at Keshab's house. They gave me luchi and
curries
to eat. I didn't know whether the food was handed to me by a washerman
or a barber; but I ate quite a little. (All laugh.)
Rakhal had asked me to eat.
(To Narendra) "With you it is all right. You are in
'this' as well as in
'that'.6
You can eat everything now. (To the devotees)
Blessed is he who
feels longing for God, though he eats pork. But shame on him whose mind
dwells on 'woman and gold', though he eats the purest food — boiled
vegetables, rice, and ghee.
"Once I had a desire to eat dal cooked in a blacksmith's house. From my
childhood I had heard the blacksmiths say, 'Do the brahmins know how to
cook?' I ate the dal, but it smelt of the blacksmith. (All
laugh.)
"I received the Allah mantra7
from Govinda Rai. Rice was cooked for me with onions8
in the kuthi. I ate some. I ate curry in Mani Mallick's garden
house, but I felt a kind of repulsion to it.
"When I went to Kamarpukur, Ramlal's father was frightened. He
thought I might eat at any and every house. He was frightened to think
I
might be expelled from the caste; so I couldn't stay long. I came away.
"Both the Vedas and the Puranas describe pure food and conduct. But
what the Vedas and the Puranas ask people to shun as impure is extolled
by the Tantra as good.
"Oh, what a state of mind I passed through! I would open my mouth,
touching, as it were, heaven and the nether world with my jaws, and
utter
the word 'Ma'. I felt that I had seized the Mother, like a fisherman
dragging
fish in his net. Let me recite a song:
This time I shall devour Thee utterly. Mother Kali!
For I was born under an evil star,
And one so born becomes, they say, the eater of his mother.
Thou must devour me first, or I myself shall eat Thee up;
One or the other it must be.
I shall besmear my hands with black,9
and with black my face;
With black I shall besmear the whole of my body.
And when Death seizes me, with black I shall besmear his face.
O Mother, I shall eat Thee up but not digest Thee;
I shall install Thee in my heart
And make Thee offerings with my mind.
You may say that by eating Kali I shall embroil myself
With Kala,10
Her Husband, but I am not afraid;
Braving His anger, I shall chant my Mother's name.
To show the world that Ramprasad is Kali's rightful son,
Come what may, I shall eat Thee up — Thee and Thy retinue —
Or lose my life attempting it.
"I almost became mad — such was my longing for God."
Narendra began to sing:
O Mother, make me mad with Thy love!
What need have I of knowledge or reason? . . .
Listening to the song, the Master again went into samadhi. Coming down to the normal plane, he assumed the attitude of Girirani11 and sang the agamani. He sang, intoxicated with divine love:
Tell me, my Uma, how have you fared, alone in the Stranger's house? . . .
He said to the devotees, "Today is the Mahashtami. The Mother
has come;
that is why I feel such an awakening of spiritual emotion."
KEDAR: "Lord, you are here. Are
you different from the Divine Mother?"
Sri Ramakrishna looked in another direction and sang in an
absent-minded
mood:
Ah, friend! I have not found Him yet, whose love has driven me mad. . . .
Again he became ecstatic and sang of the Divine Mother. As he
sang
Vijay suddenly stood up crying the name of Hari. Sri Ramakrishna, full
of
divine love, began to dance with Vijay and the other devotees.
The music was over. The Master, Vijay, Narendra, and the other devotees
sat down. All eyes were fixed on Sri Ramakrishna, who began conversing
with the devotees. He asked about their health. Kedar spoke to him
humbly in a soft, sweet voice. Narendra, Chunilal, Ram, M., and Harish
were sitting by the Master.
KEDAR (humbly): "How can I get rid of my dizziness?"
MASTER (tenderly): "One gets that. I have had it
myself.
Use a little almond oil. I have heard that it cures dizziness."
KEDAR: "I shall, sir."
MASTER (to Chunilal): "Hello! How is everything?"
CHUNILAL: "Everything is all right with us now. Balaram Babu and
Rakhal are well at Vrindavan."
MASTER: "Why have you sent so many sweetmeats?
(To Harish) Wait a day or two before coming to
Dakshineswar. You are not well. You may fall
ill again there. (To Narayan, tenderly) Sit here.
Sit by me. Come to
Dakshineswar tomorrow and have your meal there. (Pointing to M.)
Come with
him. (To M.) What do you say?"
M. wanted to accompany Sri Ramakrishna to Dakshineswar that very day.
He became thoughtful.
Surendra stood near Sri Ramakrishna. He was in the habit of drinking
and
often went to excess. This had worried the Master greatly, but he had
not
asked Surendra to give up drinking altogether. He had said to him:
'.'Look
here, Surendra! Whenever you drink wine, offer it beforehand to the
Divine
Mother. See that your brain doesn't become clouded and that you don't
reel.
The more you think of the Divine Mother, the less you will like to
drink.
The Mother is the Giver of the bliss of divine inebriation. Realizing
Her,
one feels a natural bliss."
The Master looked at Surendra and said, "You have had a drink." With
these words he went into samadhi.
It was dusk. Regaining partial consciousness, the Master sang:
Behold my Mother playing with Siva, lost in an ecstasy of joy!
Drunk with a draught of celestial wine. She reels, and yet She
does not fall. . . .
Then he chanted the name of Hari, clapping his hands
occasionally. In
a sweet voice he said: "Hari! Hari! O mind, chant the name of Hari!
Sing
the name of Hari!" Then he chanted: "Rama! Rama Rama! Rama!"
Now the Master began to pray: "O Rama! O Rama! I am without devotion
and austerity, without knowledge and love; I have not performed any
religious rites. O Rama, I have taken refuge in Thee; I have taken
shelter
at Thy feet. I do not want creature comforts; I do not seek name and
fame.
O Rama, I do not crave the eight occult powers; I do not care for a
hundred
occult powers! I am Thy servant. I have taken refuge in Thee. Grant, O
Rama, that I may have pure love for Thy Lotus Feet; that I may not be
deluded by Thy world-bewitching maya! O Rama, I have taken refuge in
Thee."
As the Master prayed all eyes were turned toward him. Hearing his
piteous
voice, few could restrain their tears.
Ramchandra Dutta came in and stood near him.
MASTER: "Where have you been. Ram?"
RAM: "I was upstairs, sir."
Ram had been making arrangements for feeding the devotees on the roof
of the house.
MASTER (to Ram, with a smile): "Isn't it
better to stay down below than
to be high up? Water accumulates in low land but flows down from a high
mound."
RAM (with a smile): "That is true, sir."
Supper was ready on the roof. Sri Ramakrishna and the devotees were
taken there and sumptuously fed. Later the Master went to Adhar's house
with M., Niranjan, and others. The Divine Mother was being worshipped
there. It had been Adhar's earnest prayer that on this sacred day Sri
Ramakrishna might bless his house with his presence.
Monday, September 29, 1884
It was the third day of the Durga Puja. The Master had been
awake in
his room at Dakshineswar since early morning. The morning worship in
the Kali temple was over and the orchestra had played the morning
melodies
in the nahabat. Brahmins and gardeners, basket in hand, were plucking
flowers for the worship of the Divine Mother. Bhavanath, Baburam,
Niranjan,
and M. had spent the night at Dakshineswar, sleeping on the porch of
the Master's room. As soon as they awoke they saw Sri Ramakrishna
dancing
in an ecstatic mood. He was chanting: "Victory to Mother Durga!
Hallowed
be the name of Durga!" He was naked and looked like a child as he
chanted
the name of the Blissful Mother. After a few moments he said: "Oh, the
bliss of divine ecstasy! Oh, the bliss of divine drunkenness!" Then he
repeatedly chanted the name of Govinda: "O Govinda! My life! My soul!"
The devotees sat on their beds and with unwinking eyes watched Sri
Ramakrishna's spiritual mood. Hazra was living at the temple garden.
Latu
was also living there to render the Master personal service. Rakhal was
still
at Vrindavan. Narendra visited Sri Ramakrishna now and then. He was
expected that day.
The devotees washed their faces. The Master took his seat on a mat on
the north verandah. Bhavanath and M. sat beside him. Other devotees
were
coming in and out of the room.
MASTER (to Bhavanath): "The truth is
that ordinary men cannot easily
have faith. But an Isvarakoti's faith is spontaneous. Prahlada burst
into
tears while writing the letter 'ka'. (The first consonant
of the Sanskrit alphabet.) It reminded him of Krishna. It is the
nature of jivas to doubt. They say yes, no doubt, but —
"Hazra can never be persuaded to believe that Brahman and Sakti, that
Sakti and the Being endowed with Sakti, are one and the same. When the
Reality appears as Creator, Preserver, and Destroyer, we call It Sakti;
when
It is inactive, we call It Brahman. But really It is one and the same
thing—
indivisible. Fire naturally brings to mind its power to burn; and the
idea of
burning naturally brings to mind the idea of fire. It is impossible to
think of
the one without the other.
"So I prayed to the Divine Mother: 'O Mother! Hazra is trying to upset
the views of this place.("This place" refers to the Master
himself.) Either give him right understanding or take him
from here.' The next day he came to me and said, Yes, I agree with
you.'
He said that God exists everywhere as All-pervading Consciousness."
BHAVANATH (smiling): "Did what Hazra
said really make you suffer so much?"
MASTER: "You see, I am now in a different mood. I can't shout and carry
on heated discussions with people. I am not in a mood now to argue and
quarrel with Hazra. Hriday said to me at Jadu Mallick's garden house,
'Uncle, don't you want to keep me with you?'12
'No,' I said, 'I am no longer
in a mood to get into heated arguments with you.'
"What is knowledge and what is ignorance? A man is ignorant so long as
he feels that God is far away. He has knowledge when he knows that God
is here and everywhere.
"When a man has true knowledge he feels that everything is filled with
Consciousness. At Kamarpukur I used to talk to Shibu, (Shivaram,
a nephew of the Master.) who was then a
lad four or five years old. When the clouds rumbled and lightning
flashed,
Shibu would say to me: There, uncle! They're striking matches again!' (All
laugh.) One day I noticed him chasing grasshoppers by
himself. The leaves
rustled in the near-by trees. 'Hush! Hush!' he said to the leaves. 'I
want to
catch the grasshoppers.' He was a child and saw everything throbbing
with
consciousness. One cannot realize God without the faith that knows no
guile,
the simple faith of a child.
"Ah, what a state of mind I passed through! One day something bit me
while I was sitting in the grass. I was afraid it might have been a
snake, and
I didn't know what to do. I had heard that if a snake bites you again
immediately after its first bite, it takes back its own venom. At once
I set out
to discover the hole so that I might let the snake bite me again. While
I
was searching, a man said to me, 'What are you doing?' After listening
to
my story, he said, 'But the snake must bite in the very same place it
has
bitten before.' Thereupon I went away. Perhaps I had been bitten by a
scorpion or some other insect.
"I had heard from Ramlal that the autumn chill was good for one's
health. Ramlal had quoted a verse to support it. One day, as I was
returning
from Calcutta in a carriage, I stuck my head out of the window so that
I
might get all the chill. Then I fell ill." (All laugh.)
Sri Ramakrishna entered his room and sat down. His legs were a little
swollen. He asked the devotees to feel his legs and see whether or not
the
pressure of their fingers made dimples. Dimples did appear with the
pressure,
but the devotees said that it was nothing.
MASTER (to Bhavanath): "Please ask
Mahendra of Sinthi to see me. I shall feel better if he reassures me."
BHAVANATH (with a smile): "You have
great faith in medicine. But we haven't so much."
MASTER: "It is God who, as the doctor,
prescribes the medicine. It is He
who, in one form, has become the physician. Dr. Gangaprasad asked me
not
to drink water at night. I regarded his statement as the words of the
Vedas.
I look upon him as the physician of heaven."
Hazra entered the room and sat down. The Master talked awhile about
different things and then said to Hazra: "You see, many people were at
Ram's house yesterday. Vijay, Kedar, and others were there. But why did
I
feel so deeply stirred at the sight of Narendra? I found that Kedar
belonged
to the realm of Divine Inebriation."
Presently Narendra arrived, and Sri Ramakrishna was exceedingly happy.
Narendra saluted the Master and began to talk with Bhavanath and others
in the room. M. was seated near by. A long mat was spread on the floor.
While talking, Narendra lay on it flat on his stomach. The Master
looked
at him and suddenly went into samadhi. He sat on Narendra's back in an
ecstatic mood.
Bhavanath sang:
O Mother, ever blissful as Thou art,
Do not deprive Thy worthless child of bliss! . . .
Sri Ramakrishna came down from the plane of samadhi. He sang:
Repeat, O mind, my Mother Durga's hallowed name!
O Gauri! O Narayani! to Thee I bow.
Thou art the day, O Mother! Thou art the dusk and the night.
As Rama Thou drawest the bow, as Krishna Thou playest the flute;
As Kali all-terrible, Thou hast silenced Siva, Thy Lord.
The ten Embodiments13
of Divine Sakti art Thou,
And Thou the ten Avatars: this time save me Thou must!
With flowers and vilwa-leaves did Yasoda worship Thee,
And Thou didst bless her by placing Krishna, the Child, in her arms.
Wherever I chance to live, O Mother, in forest or grove,
May my mind, day and night, dwell at Thy Lotus Feet;
Whether at last I die a natural or sudden death,
Oh, may my tongue repeat Durga's name at the end!
Thou mayest send me away, O Mother, but where shall I go?
Tell me, Mother, where else shall I hear so sweet a name?
Thou mayest even say to me: "Step aside! Go away!"
Yet I shall cling to Thee, O Durga! Unto Thy feet
As Thine anklets I shall cling, making their tinkling sound.
When, O Mother, Thou sittest at mighty Siva's side,
Then I shall cry from Thy feet, "Victory unto Siva!"
Mother, when as the Kite14
Thou soarest in the sky,
There, in the water beneath, as a minnow I shall be swimming;
Upon me Thou wilt pounce, and pierce me through with Thy claws.
Thus, when the breath of life forsakes me in Thy grip,
Do not deny me the shelter of Thy Lotus Feet!
From the world's bondage free me, O Spouse of the Absolute!
Thy two feet are my boat to cross this world's dark sea.
Thou art the heavens and the earth, and Thou the nether world;
From Thee have the twelve Gopalas and Hari and Brahma sprung.
Whoever treads the path, repeating "Durga! Durga!"
Siva Himself protects with His almighty trident.
Hazra was sitting on the northeast verandah counting the beads
of his
rosary. The Master went and sat in front of him, taking the rosary in
his
own hands.
MASTER (to Hazra): "You see, I
cannot use the rosary. No, perhaps I can.
Yes, I can with my left hand. But I cannot repeat the name of God with
it."
With these words Sri Ramakrishna tried to perform a little japa. But
hardly had he begun when he went into samadhi. He sat in that state a
long time, still holding the rosary in his hand. The devotees looked at
him
with wonder in their eyes. Hazra also watched the Master without
uttering
a word. After a long time Sri Ramakrishna regained consciousness of the
outer world and said that he was hungry. He often said such things to
bring his mind down to the normal plane. M. was. going to bring
something
for him to eat. The Master said, "No, I shall first go to the Kali
temple."
He went across the cement courtyard toward the Kali temple. On the
way he bowed with folded hands to the twelve Siva temples. On the left
was the temple of Radhakanta. He went there first and bowed before the
image. Then he entered the Kali temple and saluted the Mother. Sitting
on a carpet, he offered flowers at the Mother's holy feet. He also
placed a
flower on his own head. While returning from the temple he asked
Bhavanath
to carry the green coconut offered at the temple, and the charanamrita.
Coming back to his room, accompanied by M. and Bhavanath, he saluted
Hazra, who cried out in dismay: "What are you doing, sir? What is
this?"
The Master said, "Why should you say it is wrong?" Hazra often argued
with the Master, declaring that God dwelt in all beings and that
everybody
could attain Brahmajnana through sadhana. He had an exaggerated idea of
his own spiritual progress.
It was about noon. The gong and the bells announced the worship and
offering in the various temples. The brahmins, the Vaishnavas, and the
beggars
went to the guest-house to have their midday meal. The devotees of the
Master were also to partake of the sacred offerings. He asked them to
go to
the guest-house. To Narendra he said: "Won't you take your meal in my
room? All right. Narendra and I will eat here." Bhavanath, Baburam, M.,
and the other devotees went to the guest-house.
After his meal Sri Ramakrishna rested a few minutes. The devotees were
on the verandah engaged in light conversation. He soon joined them and
was happy in their company. It was about two o'clock. All were still
sitting
on the verandah, when suddenly Bhavanath appeared in the garb of a
brahmachari, dressed in an ochre cloth, kamandalu in hand, his face
beaming
with smiles.
MASTER (with a smile): "That is his
inner feeling. Therefore he has dressed himself as a brahmachari."
NARENDRA: "He has put on the garb of a
brahmachari; let me put on the garb of a Tantrik worshipper."
HAZRA: "Then you will have to follow the
Tantrik rituals, with women, wine, and so on."
Sri Ramakrishna did not encourage the conversation. Indeed, he made
fun of it.
Suddenly the Master began to dance in an ecstatic mood. He sang:
Mother, Thou canst not trick me any more,
For I have seen Thy crimson Lotus Feet. . . .
The Master said: "Ah, how wonderfully Rajnarayan sings about
the
Divine Mother! He sings and dances that way. The music of Nakur Acharya
at Kamarpukur is also wonderful. Ah, how beautiful his singing and
dancing
are!
A sadhu was staying at the Panchavati. But he was a hot-tempered man;
he scolded and cursed everyone. He came to the Master's room wearing
wooden sandals and asked the Master, "Can I get fire here?" Sri
Ramakrishna
saluted him and stood with folded hands as long as he remained
in the room.
When he had left, Bhavanath said to the Master with a laugh, "What
great respect you showed the sadhu!"
MASTER (smiling): "You see, he too
is Narayana, though full of tamas.
This is the way one should please people who have an excess of tamas.
Besides, he is a sadhu."
The devotees were engaged in a game of golakdham.15
Hazra joined
them. The Master stood by, watching them play. M. and Kishori reached
"heaven". Sri Ramakrishna bowed before them and said, "Blessed are you
two brothers." He said to M., aside, "Don't play any more." Hazra fell
into
"hell". The Master said: "What's the matter with Hazra? Again!" No
sooner
had Hazra got out of "hell" than he fell into it again. All burst into
laughter.
Latu, at the first throw of the dice, went to "heaven" from "earth". He
began
to cut capers of joy. "See Latu's joy!" said the Master. "He would have
been terribly sad if he hadn't achieved this. (Aside to the
devotees)
This too has a meaning. Hazra is so vain that he thinks he will triumph
over all even
in this game. This is the law of God, that He never humiliates a
righteous
person. Such a man is victorious everywhere."
Sri Ramakrishna was sitting on the small couch in his room. Narendra,
Baburam, Bhavanath, and M. were sitting on the floor. Narendra referred
to various religious sects — the Ghoshpara, Panchanami, and others. Sri
Ramakrishna described their views and condemned their immoral
practices. He
said that they could not follow the right course of spiritual
discipline, but
enjoyed sensuous pleasures in the name of religion.
MASTER (to Narendra): "You need not
listen to these things. The bhairavas
and the bhairavis of the Tantrik sect also follow this kind of
discipline.
While in Benares I was taken to one of their mystic circles. Each
bhairava
had a bhairavi with him. I was asked to drink the consecrated wine, but
I
said I couldn't touch wine. They drank it. I thought perhaps they would
then practise meditation and japa. But nothing of the sort. They began
to
dance. I was afraid they might fall into the Ganges: the circle had
been
made on its bank. It is very honourable for husband and wife to assume
the
roles of bhairava and bhairavi.
(To Narendra and the others) "Let me tell you this.
I regard woman as
my mother; I regard myself as her son. This is a very pure attitude.
There
is no danger in it. To look on woman as a sister is also not bad. But
to
assume the attitude of a 'hero', to look on woman as one's mistress, is
the
most difficult discipline. Tarak's father followed this discipline. It
is very
difficult. In this form of sadhana one cannot always maintain the right
attitude.
"There are various paths to reach God. Each view is a path. It is like
reaching the Kali temple by different roads. But it must be said that
some
paths are clean and some dirty. It is good to travel on a clean path.
"Many views, many paths — and I have seen them all. But I don't enjoy
them any more; they all quarrel.
"No one else is here, and you are my own people. Let me tell you
something.
I have come to the final realization that God is the Whole and I am
a part of Him, that God is the Master and I am His servant.
Furthermore,
I think every now and then that He is I and I am He."
The devotees listened to these words in deep silence.
BHAVANATH (humbly): "I feel
disturbed if I have a misunderstanding
with someone. I feel that in that case I am not able to love all."
MASTER: "Try at the outset to talk to him and establish a friendly
relationship with him. If you fail in spite of your efforts, then don't
give it
another thought. Take refuge in God. Meditate on Him. There is no use
in giving up God and feeling depressed from thinking about others."
BHAVANATH: "Great souls, such as Christ
and Chaitanya, have admonished us to love all beings."
MASTER: "Love you must, because God dwells in all beings.
But salute a wicked person from a distance. You speak of Chaitanya? He
also used to
restrain his spiritual feeling in the presence of unsympathetic people.
At
Srivas's house he put Srivas's mother-in-law out of the room, dragging
her out
by the hair."
BHAVANATH: "It was not he but others who did it."
MASTER: "Could the others have done it without his approval? What can
be done? Suppose a man cannot make another love him; must he worry
about it day and night? Must I waste my mind, which should be given to
God, on useless, things? I say: 'O Mother, I don't want Narendra,
Bhavanath,
Rakhal, or anybody. I seek Thee alone. What shall I do with man?'
When the Blissful Mother comes to my house, how much of the Chandi
I shall hear!
How many monks will come here, and how many yogis with matted locks!
"When I attain God I shall attain everything. I renounced gold
and silver,
saying, 'Rupee is clay and clay is rupee; gold is clay and clay is
gold.' With
these words I threw gold, silver, and clay into the Ganges. Then I was
afraid at the thought that Mother Lakshmi might be angry with me
because
I had treated Her wealth with contempt; that She might even stop my
meals.
So I prayed to the Divine Mother, 'O Mother, I want Thee and nothing
else.' I knew that by realizing Her I should get everything."
BHAVANATH (smiling): "This is the
shrewd calculation of a business man."
MASTER (smiling): "Yes, that is so.
Once the Lord was pleased with a
certain devotee. He appeared before him and said: 'I am very much
pleased
with your austerities. Ask a boon of Me.' The devotee said, 'O Lord, if
You
are gracious enough to give me a boon, then please grant that I may eat
from gold plates with my grandchildren.' One boon covered many things —
wealth, children, and grandchildren." (All laugh.)
Hazra was sitting on the verandah.
MASTER: "Do you know what Hazra wants? He wants
money. His family
is in distress; he has debts. He thinks that God will give him money
because
he devotes himself to japa and meditation."
A DEVOTEE: "Can't God fulfil a devotee's desire?"
MASTER: "If it is His sweet will. But God doesn't
take entire responsibility
for a devotee unless the devotee is completely intoxicated with
ecstatic love
for Him. At a feast it is only a child whom one takes by the hand and
seats
at his place. Who does that with older people? Not until a man thinks
so
much of God that he cannot look after himself does God take on his
responsibilities.
Hazra doesn't inquire about his family. His son said to Ramlal:
'Please ask father to come home. We shall not ask anything of him.'
These
words almost brought tears to my eyes. Hazra's mother said to Ramlal:
'Please ask Pratap (Hazra.) to come home just once.
Also ask your uncle (The Master.) to request
him to come home.' I told him about it, but he didn't listen to me.
"Is a mother to be trifled with? Before becoming a sannyasi
Chaitanyadeva
worked hard to persuade his mother to let him renounce home. Mother
Sachi said that she would kill Keshab Bharati.16
Chaitanyadeva did his
utmost to persuade her. He said: 'Mother, I shall not renounce home if
you
won't let me. But if you compel me to lead a householder's life, I
shall die.
And, mother, even if I go away as a sannyasi, you will be able to see
me
whenever you desire. I shall stay near you. I shall see you every now
and
then.' Only when Chaitanya explained it to her thus did she give her
permission.
Narada could not go to the forest to practise austerity as long as his
mother was alive. He had to take care of her. After her death he went
away
to realize God.
"When I went to Vrindavan I felt no desire to return to Calcutta. It
was
arranged that I should live with Gangama. (A great
woman saint of vrindavan..) Everything was settled. My
bed was to be on one side and Gangama's on the other. I resolved not to
go
back to Calcutta. I said to myself, 'How long must I eat a kaivarta's17
food?' 'No,' said Hriday to me, 'let us go to Calcutta.' He pulled me
by one hand
and Gangama pulled me by the other. I felt an intense desire to live at
Vrindavan. But just then I remembered my mother. That completely
changed
everything. She was old. I said to myself: 'My devotion to God will
take to
its wings if I have to worry about my mother. I would rather live with
her.
Then I shall have peace of mind and be able to meditate on God.'
(To Narendra) "Why don't you say a few Words to
Hazra about going
home? The other day he said to me, 'Yes, I shall go home and stay there
three days.' But now he has forgotten all about it.
(To the devotees) "We have talked about filthy
things — Ghoshpara and
things like that. Govinda! Govinda! Govinda! Now chant the name of
Hari.
Let there be a dish of rice pudding and sweets after the ordinary
lentils."
Narendra began to sing:
Fasten your mind, O man, on the Primal Purusha,
Who is the Cause of all causes,
The Stainless One, the Beginningless Truth.
As Prana He pervades the infinite universe;
The man of faith beholds Him,
Living, resplendent, the Root of all.
Beyond the senses, eternal, the Essence of Consciousness,
He shines in the cave of the heart,
Adorned with Holiness, Wisdom, and Love;
By meditating on Him, man is delivered from grief.
Of countenance ever serene,
An inexhaustible Ocean of Virtue,
None can fathom His depths; yet freely, of His own grace,
Does He reveal Himself
To those who come to His feet for shelter,
Merciful since they are helpless and He is the Ever-forgiving,
The Giver of happiness,
The Ready Help in the sea of our woe.
Unswervingly just, bestowing the fruits of our deeds, good and ill,
Yet is He the Fount of Compassion,
The Ocean of Mercy brimming with Love;
Even to hear of His glory suffuses the eyes with tears.
Gaze on His face and be blest:
Your heart is hungry for Him, O man!
Bright with unspeakable beauty, peerless and without stain,
No words can ever describe Him;
Be as a beggar before His gate
And worship Him day and night, beseeching Him for His grace.
He sang again:
In Wisdom's firmament the moon of Love is rising full,
And Love's flood-tide, in surging waves, is flowing everywhere.
O Lord, how full of bliss Thou art! Victory unto Thee!
On every side shine devotees, like stars around the moon;
Their Friend, the Lord All-merciful, joyously plays with them.
Behold! the gates of paradise today are open wide. . . .
Sri Ramakrishna was dancing in a circle. The devotees joined him. They all sang and danced. Their bliss was indescribable. The Master sang about the Divine Mother:
Behold my Mother playing with Siva, lost in an ecstasy of joy! . . .
Sri Ramakrishna was highly pleased because M. had joined in
the music.
He said to M., with a smile, "The atmosphere would have been more
intense
with divine fervour if a drum had accompanied the music and played:
'Tak tak ta dhina! Dak dak da dhina!'"
It was dusk when the kirtan was finished.
Wednesday, October 1, 1884
O my flute, sing Hari's name!
You cannot know the highest Truth
Without Lord Hari's grace.
His name removes our bitter grief;
Repeat the name of Hari, then,
Repeat Sri Krishna's holy name!
If He bestows His grace on me,
No longer shall I be afraid
Of this unfriendly world;
Sing then Lord Hari's name, my flute!
Our only treasure is His name.
Govinda says: Behold, my days
Are passing by in vain;
In the world's deep and shoreless sea,
Oh, let me not be drowned!
Vaishnavcharan sang again, this time about Mother Durga:
O tongue, always repeat the name of Mother Durga;
Who but your Mother Durga will save you in distress? . . .
The Master and the musician sang again and again the following lines from the song:
The moving and the unmoving, the gross and the subtle, art Thou;
Creation and preservation art Thou, and the last dissolution.
Thou art the Primal Root of this manifold universe;
The Mother of the three worlds, their only Saviour, art Thou;
Thou art the Sakti of all, and Thou Thine own Sakti, too.
Kedar and several devotees stood up. They were about to return
home.
Kedar saluted the Master and bade him good-bye.
MASTER: "Should you go away without bidding Adhar good-bye? Wouldn't
that be an act of discourtesy?"
KEDAR: "'When God is pleased, the world is pleased.'
You are staying;
so in a sense we are all staying. I am not feeling well. Besides, I am
a little
nervous about my social conventions.18
Once before I had trouble with our community."
VIJAY (pointing to the Master): "Should we go away
and leave him here?"
Just then Adhar came in to take the Master to the dining-room, for the
meal was ready. Sri Ramakrishna stood up and said, addressing Kedar and
Vijay: "Come. Come with me." They followed him and partook of the
dinner together with the other devotees.
After dinner they all returned to the drawing-room, where the devotees
sat around the Master. Kedar said to him with folded hands, "Please
forgive
me for hesitating to eat here." Perhaps the thought had come to his
mind
that he should not have hesitated, since the Master himself had no
scruples
about eating at Adhar's house.
Kedar worked at Dacca. Many devotees brought offerings of sweets and
other food for him. Referring to this, Kedar said to the Master:
"People
want to give me food. What should I do? Lord, what is your command in
this matter?"
MASTER: "One can eat food even from an
untouchable if the untouchable
is a devotee of God. After spending seven years in a God-intoxicated
state
at Dakshineswar, I visited Kamarpukur. Oh, what a state of mind I was
in
at that time! Even a prostitute fed me with her own hands. But I cannot
allow that now."
Kedar was about to take his leave.
KEDAR (in a low voice): "Lord, please
transmit power to me. Many people come to me. What do I know?"
MASTER: "Everything will be all right. One
gets along well if one is sincerely devoted to God."
Yogendra, the editor of a Bengali paper, the Bangavasi,
entered the room.
The conversation turned to the Personal God and God without form.
MASTER: "God has form; again, He is
formless. How many aspects He has!
We cannot comprehend Him. Why should we say that God is formless only?"
YOGENDRA: "That is the one amazing thing about the Brahmo Samaj.
There even a boy twelve years old sees God as formless. The members of
the
Adi Samaj (A branch of the Brahmo Samaj.) do not object very
much to God with form. They are allowed to
attend ritualistic worship if it takes place in respectable families."
MASTER (smiling): "How nicely he has put it!
Even a boy sees the formless God!"
ADHAR: "Shivanath Babu does not believe in God's forms."
VIJAY: "That is his mistake. (Pointing to the Master)
As he says,
the chameleon assumes different colours — now this colour, now that.
Only the
man who lives under the tree knows the animal's true colour.
"While meditating I saw images of gods painted on a canvas. How many
gods! How many different things they said! I said to myself: 'I shall
go to
the Master. He will explain it all to me.'"
MASTER: "You saw correctly."
KEDAR: "God assumes forms for the sake of
His devotees. Through ecstatic
love a devotee sees God with form. Dhruva had a vision of the Lord. He
said: 'Why don't, Your ear-rings move?' The Lord said, 'They will move
if
you move them.'"
MASTER: "One must accept everything: God
with form and God without
form. While meditating in the Kali temple I noticed Ramani, a
prostitute.
I said, 'Mother, I see that Thou art in that form too.' Therefore I say
one
must accept everything. One does not know when or how God will reveal
Himself."
The Master sang:
A mendicant has come to us, ever absorbed in divine moods. . . .